Cluster Bombs

Prime Minister Gordon Brown has signalled the end of Britain's use of cluster bombs.

More than a hundred nations have undertaken to destroy their stocks of the weapons, which can indiscriminately kill and injure civilians long after conflict has ended. Some nations, however, were notable by their absence - namely the US, Russia and China.

The Government has decided to abandon completely the M73 and M85 cluster weapons it has in its arsenal. In a move likely to annoy the US the Government will also forbid the stockpiling of similar weapons at US installations located in the UK.

Brown's decision contradicts the recommendation of some of Britain's most high ranking military leaders. I also disagree with the PM's decision on this.

As I said when I wrote positively about the renewal of Trident, we can't uninvent the wheel with these weapons. They exist and our enemies would use them against us given the option.

The UK has always adopted a responsible approach when it comes to the weapons it uses - we don't go for collateral damage and we don't like to leave an indelible mark on the landscape years after hostilities have ended. Although we have these weapons we rarely, if ever, actually use them but it's nice for commanders to have the reassurance that they're available as a last resort.

I can see circumstances where the use of such weapons might be appropriate - for example, having driven the Taliban high into the Afghan mountains and well away from civilian occupation.

Brown's weak, legacy-making decision has yet again tied the hands of Britain's Armed Forces.

Airborne Littering

Watching the local news today I see that a teenager has been issued with a fixed penalty notice for littering the streets of Newcastle. Nothing wrong with that you'll probably be thinking - and you'd be absolutely right.

But this case has attracted widespread media attention because the item of litter in question was a helium balloon, which was released by 16-year old Max Twizell of Heddon on the Wall.

Max was stood in the Old Eldon Square area of Newcastle City Centre when he saw the balloon and decided to experiment with its voice-altering contents. Once he'd achieved squeaky-voice status he released the balloon, not realising he was being watched by a council warden.

People have become distracted by the idea that this balloon drifted off miles into the atmosphere, as most sealed helium balloons do, when in fact Max had just abandoned it in an unsealed state. Consequently, instead of floating romantically into the distance it actually buzzed around as it rapidly deflated and fell to the ground.

Admitting his guilt, Max told BBC News: "£50 is a lot of money to me. I know I did something wrong, but if the warden had asked me to pick it up I would have done. But it was just a balloon."

That statement alone confirms the fact that the balloon must have landed in a litter-like manner nearby.

Of course that chain of events doesn't make such good headlines for the trashy tabloids. It's also reasonable to say that quite a lot of people reporting this story haven't quite managed to put two and two together over the untied state of the balloon.

Max's mother Lorraine is seeking legal advice, branding the fine as "excessive".

She said: "There are far worse crimes and far worse cases of littering in the city and I think it is vindictive and just a way of trying to break up the kids who hang around Old Eldon Square."

Yes Lorraine, that may well be true but I'm sure the council would fine anyone who dropped litter under the nose of one of their officials.

The Sun Exclusive - Toxic Sofas

I was reading Iain Dale earlier and he was poking fun at The Sun's 'The Whip' political gossip column. Each week The Whip gives the latest tit-bits of rumour from Westminster village.

It's all very much "an unnamed Whip source said..." and "rumour has it that..." state of affairs. Or a lot of uncorroborated bollocks if you prefer. According to Iain most of this week's scoops came straight from the previous day's Independent.

Anyhow, it appears that The Sun's investigative genius has pulled another great exclusive out for tomorrow's front page (which I'm writing about today - clever, huh?)

They lead with the attention grabbing headline: "Toxic Sofas Burn 1,000". Closer investigation of their 'exclusive' story reveals that hundreds of people have suffered blistering and rashes in response to preservative chemicals hidden in their leather sofas. There is a particularly nasty fungicide that can release its irritant vapour when a warm body is sat nearby.

Or put another way the same story that the BBC's Watchdog programme has covered at least twice over the last six months. So all in all pretty exclusive.

Obviously they're struggling to fill the front page because they don't want to bash their mates the Government over the current fuel crisis.

Woolies Abandons CD Single Sales

The first nail has been driven into the compact disc coffin with Woolworths' announcement that they plan to ditch CD single sales.

The high street retailer, which has been selling chart hits in its stores since 1952, is currently the UK's biggest music seller with one in every three CDs being purchased there.

Their decision comes in response to the rapid decline of CD sales over the last few years. In 1999 a record 78 million CD singles were sold in the UK, compared to just 8 million last year. The number of music downloads in 2007 was 72.6 million.

Woolworths are filling the gap by launching their own download service. During the first week of Woolworths Downloads fans will be purchase their favourite tracks for the introductory price of 59 pence and albums will be available for £6.99.

It just goes to prove what I was saying last month: "CDs will shortly become a thing of the past for computer users."

Make sure you bubblewrap your discs now!

Trucking Hell

Hundreds of lorries are converging on Central London today in protest at the spiralling cost of fuel.

At least 300 haulage vehicles were chaperoned to a specially closed section of the A40 in the White City area of the capital. Organisers are hoping that at least twice that number turn up by the end of day.

In the past year the price of Brent Crude oil has more than doubled from $65 to $135 per barrel. This increase, combined with the Government's insatiable appetite for fuel duty, has pushed the price of filling a lorry with diesel from £582 to £762 over the same period.

The first lorry driver on the scene, Jose Girvan of KJS Transport Services in Buckinghamshire, told the Times: "Prices are just getting higher and higher and higher. The Government has got to cut the duty on diesel, they really must do something.

"I'm a family man, I have a mortgage. My job is not as secure as it was."

Today's protesters are likely to win the sympathy of the wider motoring population, with the average price of unleaded a crippling 114 pence per litre and plans to implement a 2 pence per litre increase in October.

The Chancellor, Alistair Darling, faces a showdown with Labour MPs today over his plans to radically overhaul the system of Vehicle Excise Duty. Mr Darling's retrospective tax snatching plans will see 'Mondeo man' - the very person Labour needs the support of come election time - facing car tax hike of almost 100% from next year.

All in all it's looking pretty gloomy for the Government.

Pot Bad Luck

Customs officials at Narita International Airport in Japan have unwittingly given a passenger 5 ounces of cannabis after a training exercise went wrong.

The drugs had been randomly stashed in the suitcase of a passenger arriving from Hong Kong. The plan was that when the passenger passed through customs the drugs would be detected and recovered from the luggage.

Unfortunately the drugs dog failed to sniff out the target suitcase and the official who placed the drugs couldn't remember the identity of the case he had chosen.

Similar exercises usually involve a training suitcase. The customs officer involved told NHK (the Japan Broadcasting Corporation): "I knew that using passengers' bags is prohibited, but I did it because I wanted to improve the sniffer dog's ability."

Japan has strict laws against drugs and possession of small amounts of cannabis can lead to a prison sentence. Anyone finding the package is asked to contact Tokyo customs as soon as possible.

Normal Service is Resumed

As the Crewe and Nantwich by-election is now over and Edward Timpson has joined the ranks of Conservative MPs, it's my plan to sway away from domestic politics this coming week. Of course that might all change if someone comes out and hatchets the PM in the meantime.

Apologies for the amount of coverage the by-election has received here. Winning a by-election, just like eating an elephant, has to be done nibble by nibble. We nibbled away and got the result we wanted in the end.

I shall not be giving the same coverage to the upcoming Henley by-election because, for obvious mathematical reasons, that's less of a challenge.

I don't feel like writing too much more today because I'm just back from a mini camping excursion. The upshot is I got very little sleep, drank quite a lot of beer and ate way too much barbecued food. I also caught the sun so I've got that all over prickly discomfort.

That'll do for today.

Conservatives Win Crewe and Nantwich

Edward Timpson - the Conservative MP
for Crewe and Nantwich.

The Conservatives have swept to victory in the Crewe and Nantwich by-election, beating Labour into a humiliating second place by overturning their 7,000 majority.

Today's result is the first time the Conservatives have beaten Labour in a by-election in more than 20 years - the last time being Angela Rumbold's victory in Mitcham and Morden in 1982.

All day the people of Crewe and Nantwich have been flocking to the polling stations, sending turnout spiralling to an impressive 58.2%. The Conservatives benefited from a strong turnout of their supporters and floating voters. Predictably, a significant number of Labour supporters were too apathetic to bother voting.

Early into the count it was apparent that the bundles of ballot papers stacked high on Conservative Edward Timpson's table were dwarfing those of his Labour rival Tamsin Dunwoody.

The final result was as follows:

• Edward Timpson, Conservatives, 20,539 (49%)
• Tamsin Dunwoody, Labour, 12,679 (31%)
• Elizabeth Shenton, Liberal Democrats, 6,040 (15%)

(I'll complete the results list later)

The swing from Labour to the Conservatives was just under 18% - a trend, if replicated at General Election, which would see the Conservatives firmly in power with a Parliamentary majority approaching 300 seats.

As the Labour Party limp away from leafy Cheshire questions are bound to arise about the Party's management of their campaign on both a national and local level. Their tasteless and dishonest campaign against victor Edward Timpson has received a particularly lukewarm reception from the voters.

Today's result is also leave huge question marks over Gordon Brown's continued Premiership and leadership of the Labour Party. How much longer can he cling to power?

OCR Launch New GCSE Music Exam - With Answers Provided

In the latest example of exam dumbing down the Oxford, Cambridge and RSA (OCR) board inadvertently provided the answers on the back of a GCSE music question paper.

The humerous oversight, affecting around 12,000 students sitting the exam last Friday, has been attributed to a printing error. The paper included a comprehensive copyright acknowledgement on its back page, which could be used to answer questions contained within.

The mistake was only picked up when invigilators were inspecting the papers immediately prior to the exam. Some centres failed to notice the mistake until their eagle-eyed students were well into the paper.

An OCR spokeswoman told the Press Association: "OCR regrets that a printing error may have affected a small number of marks on one of the GCSE Music papers which was taken last Friday (May 16).

"A maximum of 5% of the marks on this particular paper are potentially affected. In addition, this exam is only one of four papers which make up the GCSE qualification.

"All exam papers have a copyright statement dealing with source material on the back page. This one in particular had more detail than is usual in a music paper."

The new exams watchdog Ofqual is aware of OCR's mistake and is keeping a close eye on how it's resolved. Students sitting the exam will not be penalised for the board's error.

Indisputable proof - as if any was needed - that exams really are getting easier!

Crewe and Nantwich Election Predictions

From today's search results I know lots of people are looking for Crewe and Nantwich exit polls.

There are no exit polls because Crewe and Nantwich is too small a constituency for the sample to be representative.

The Telegraph has come up with an interesting little tool to bypass this issue and provide some indication of tonight's outcome. It is based on the efficient markets hypothesis - namely data obtained from betting patterns, where the people laying the bets have a vested interest in considering the outcome closely (and winning).

The Telegraph interactive election predictor is found here. The predictions at 12 noon are shown in the image above.

The bookies aren't wrong very often!

Crewe and Nantwich Goes to the Polls

In keeping with electoral tradition I shall avoid campaigning today and give my usual message to the people of Crewe and Nantwich: Go and vote.

Be sure to exercise your right to vote and make your opinions heard in today's Parliamentary by-election - whoever you decide to vote for.

The polling stations are open between the hours of 7 am and 10 pm.

You do not need your polling card to vote, but be sure to have some addressed form of identification just in case. If you're a postal voter and have forgotten to return your vote it isn't too late - just hand it into any polling station and it will still be counted.

As the people of Crewe and Nantwich speak the nation really will be listening. I shall be bringing a full update on the day's results later this evening or early tomorrow.

Telephone Spammers - Three

Today I officially declare that I'm adding another company to my hate list - Three.

I can tell this is going to get very confusing so I'll refer to the mobile telephone provider as 'Three' and give the number by its figure.

Over the past week I have received no less than 3 calls from Three - all of them unsolicited. The first call was a bit subliminal. It was an Indian chap on the phone and the conversation went something like this:

Three Rep (TR): "Hello, can I speak to Mr Jackson?"

Tom: "Yes, speaking."

TR: "Hello, my name is Paul (I can't remember - it was definitely a good Indian like Paul) and I'm calling from Three network. Is it okay to ask you a few questions about your current mobile phone?"

Tom: "Go on then."

TR: "Can you tell me which mobile operator you are using?"

Tom: "Vodafone."

TR: "And what's your current tariff and price?"

Tom: [Gives details]

TR: "Oh, you're paying far too much for that. I have a better deal for you."

Tom: "Well, I'm not really interested in a better deal because I'm tied into an 18-month contract with Vodafone."

TR: "How far into your contract are you?"

Tom: "Only a few months. I think I just renewed it in January, so there's definitely no way I could enter into an agreement with Three."

TR: "Ahh. Well since it's such a good offer I would like you to recommend someone else so I can give it to them."

Tom: "No, I can't do that. My friends would not be very pleased if I gave you their details so you could cold call them."

TR: "Ahh. But it's not cold calling. It's giving them the benefit of this great offer from Three."

Tom: "No. If they aren't inviting you to call then it's cold calling. Now, can you answer a couple of questions for me?"

TR: "Yes Mr Jackson. What would you like to know?"

Tom: "Have you heard of something called the Telephone Preference Service?"

TR: "No (amazingly), I've not heard of that."

Tom: "Well, it's an organisation here in the UK that allows people to opt of our receiving unsolicited telephone calls just like this one. I'm registered with it."

TR: "Ahh."

Tom: "And did you know that by calling me, as an unsolicited sales caller, you are probably breaking the law?"

TR: "No, I did not know that."

Tom: "Well now you do. Kindly do not call me again."

I thought I'd expressed myself sufficiently well to avoid Three from calling me again - until today that is. Only a couple of days after I laid the law down to Paul and another chap from Three network rang me back again twice.

It astounds me that Three has the brass neck to hire slave labour in overseas call centres and neglect to tell them the intricacies of the Privacy and Electronic Communications and Distance Selling Regulations.

So Three - you repugnant cold-calling bastards - get your house in order or you will be dealt with.

Northumbria Police Kill Teenager

I heard yesterday the sad news that teenager Hayley Adamson had been struck and killed by a police vehicle in the west end of Newcastle.

Hayley would have been sitting her GCSEs at the moment, but unfortunately her true potential will never be realised now.

The vehicle involved, a marked Volvo T5, had been in the area searching for a stolen vehicle when a different vehicle was flagged by its Automatic Number Plate Recognition (ANPR) system. It was crewed by a single officer who, given the nature of the vehicle involved, must have been an advanced driver in the Force's traffic department.

An investigation into the circumstances surrounding the incident is being conducted by the Independent Police Complaints Commission (IPCC).

According to the IPCC's press release it's unclear whether the vehicle's emergency warning system had been activated. However, several witnesses at the scene have told the media that the vehicle did not have any blue lights or siren operating at the time. At least one other person has claimed the vehicle had no headlights on either.

I have broached the issue of police driving in the past. The sources I cited back then leave little doubt that some police drivers have scant regard for the same rules of the road that bind us all. It's also true they are working in an age where every car stopped and every person searched count toward petty performance targets.

Make no mistake that the law applies equally to those driving police vehicles as it does everyone else - at least it should in principle.

I hope the IPCC's investigation is fair and thorough.

Does Anyone Actually Read the Daily Mirror?

I've just had the misfortune of catching glimpse of a Daily Mirror editorial titled "David Cameron: I want to be the new Thatcher".

It puts an interesting slant on history to say the least. According to Political Editor Bob Roberts: "David Cameron compared himself to Margaret Thatcher yesterday as he hinted at savage cuts if the Conservatives snatch power.

"The Tory leader spoke of lowering taxes should his party win the next general election - which also means reducing spending."

I remember watching David speaking yesterday (read his full statement here) and the emphasis wasn't so much on cutting government expenditure - more like getting better value for money by ridding government of petty bureaucracy and unnecessary expense.

David cited the following examples of money that has been thrown down the drain by Labour:

• £20 billion wasted on an NHS computer that still isn't working properly.
• £2.3 billion spent refurbishing the offices of MOD civil servants.
• £2 billion of tax credits lost due to fraud and error in a single year.

Just those three examples amount to more than 4% of the UK's total income from taxation - put another way that money could have given every household in the country one year's free Council Tax. It is financial mismanagement on a huge scale by anyone's reckoning. And guess what - if the Conservatives managed to cut that wastage it wouldn't be to the detriment of any public services at all.

Of course the Daily Mirror is not the sort of publication that lets the truth stand in the way of a good story.

For the record David only mentioned Margaret Thatcher by name once in his entire statement and rightly so. She was a fine leader to this nation - she gripped the trade unions, fought off Argentinian aggression against our Sovereign territory, gave council tenants a chance of climbing the housing ladder and patched up the double-figure interest and inflation rates left behind from Labour in the seventies.

Funnily enough Roberts chose not to focus on those points, but rather some of the more negative aspects of her administration. I bet he was a militant trade unionist himself before he dropped down the social ladder to work at the Mirror.

Only a newspaper as blissfully detached from reality as the Mirror could deny the way Margaret Thatcher steered Britain in the right direction.

Albino Tadpoles Amaze Scientists

They haven't got much of a life these scientists, so the discovery of albino tadpoles in Wales has been enough to push them to the verge of apoplexy.

The pale globules of frog spawn and off-white tadpoles were found in a garden pond in Carmarthenshire.

Experts from Froglife - a voluntary organisation tasked with the conservation of native amphibians in Britain - believe the "highly unusual" discovery is due to a higher than normal population of frogs carrying the rare albinism recessive gene.

It is unlikely that the tadpoles will survive to breeding age because their unusual colour makes them attractive to predators.

If you hop across (excuse the pun) to the Urban Dictionary you'll also find that albino tadpoles has a different meaning!

National Recognition of our Armed Forces

Discriminating against uniformed members of the UK Armed Forces will become a new criminal offence, under sweeping new proposals accepted by the Government earlier today.

Quentin Davies, Labour MP for Grantham and Stamford and former Tory Shadow Defence Minister, outlined a range of new measures aimed at improving the relationship between the military and the civilian public.

The forty recommendations, outlined in a report called "National Recognition of our Armed Forces", have been accepted in full by the Government.

This includes the call for new legislation to criminalise discrimination against military personnel wearing uniforms in public. Other recommendations included in the report are:

• The wider use of uniforms in public.
• Legal protection of the uniform (outlawing discrimination as mentioned above).
• A more systematic approach to homecoming parades.
• The establishment of a British Armed Forces and Veterans' Day.
• A modern day replacement to the Royal Tournament.
• Increasing the number of Combined Cadet Forces in comprehensive schools.
• Measures to strengthen the Cadet Forces.
• The introduction of military awareness to the National Curriculum.
• Widening access to Military Museums.
• The introduction of a veterans' card that could be used to access certain benefits.
• A relaxation on the rules prohibiting members of the Armed Forces from accepting hospitality and benefits.

The full document is available to download here (PDF, 573 kB).

The creation of a special Armed Forces Day, expected to be merged into the existing Veterans' Day, was one of the report proposals. Mr Davies suggested that if the Government decided to create a new Bank Holiday for the occasion it should be at the end of June. If not a Bank Holiday then a Saturday should be chosen, to allow schoolchildren and those in weekday employment to support the events.

Another key focus of the report was to build links between youth and the Armed Forces by encouraging more service personnel to visit schools and by expanding the Combined Cadet Force.

It's certainly positive to see the Government taking Mr Davies' recommendations so seriously and it'll be interesting to see how quickly they act to implement them.

I'm sure it'll make an interested point of discussion when I'm hosting with the Army Presentation Team next month.

Downing Street Upgrades to Duller TV

In an attempt to reach out the people the Prime Minister, Gordon Brown, today made his maiden speech on Downing Street's new YouTube channel.

The new channel comes amid Conservative claims that Mr Brown, known for his lacklustre performance in front of the media, is "an analogue Prime Minister in a digital age."

In his first 40 second clip the PM invites people to send in their questions in about "how globalisation is working, what's happening to climate change, how we can build the houses we need, how we can get the jobs we need for the future, how we can do better with the health service and how we can do better with all the different services that government provides."

The PM promises the new question and answer sessions will be a regular event, although going on the basis of the popular Number 10 e-petitions they'll only be answering the questions they want to and the right of reply will be somewhat limited.

The deadline for the first questions to be submitted is June 21 - assuming he is still the Prime Minister by then!

Brown in action:

Backbench Murmurs Over Vehicle Excise Duty

Alistair Darling, the Chancellor of the Exchequer, is facing a fresh backlash by Labour MPs over his Budget plans to increase the vehicle excise duty of more polluting cars.

Ronnie Campbell, MP for Blyth Valley in Northumberland, has tabled an early-day motion calling on the Chancellor to rescind plans, which could see the owners of some popular makes of family car paying an extra £90 for their tax disc. He has written to his fellow Labour MPs and so far has more than twenty signatures in support.

In this year's Budget the Chancellor announced that the system of vehicle excise duty would receive a major overhaul. The new system would see vehicles taxed on a sliding scale depending on their carbon emissions, with the cleanest vehicles paying less. Furthermore a new 'showroom tax', also on a sliding scale, would be added to the price of newly registered vehicles from 2010.

New vehicle excise duty tax bands (from BBC News).

What concerns Mr Campbell the most is that the proposed measures - announced in this year's Budget but not due to be implemented until next year - amount to retrospective taxation on those who can least afford it.

Speaking to the Guardian, Mr Campbell said: "They're (the Government) saying, if you've got an old car, you have to go out and get a new one: but these are working-class people; they can't afford to do that."

Justine Greening, the Conservative Shadow Minister for the Treasury, said of the new tax hike: "This measure is deeply regressive, and it will most acutely affect low-income families."

So if you were lucky enough to benefit from the Chancellor's £120 giveaway last week then rest assured that he'll definitely be taking it back again somehow!

Crewe and Nantwich - Labour Snob Warfare

The Crewe and Nantwich Labour Party has mounted possibly the most underhand defence of a parliamentary constituency that politics has seen.

I've been aware of the cheap and tacky propaganda being spewed out by Team Dunwoody for the last couple of weeks, but it wasn't until I saw some first hand that it dawned on me just how low Labour were prepared to stoop to keep their foot in the door.

Their inverse snobbery against the Conservative candidate Edward Timpson wreaks of desperation. With each opinion poll they see Crewe and Nantwich slipping further from their grasp and they're not bothered what stories they make up in an attempt to redress the balance.

One of Team Dunwoody's party pieces is to portray Edward as a distant snob who lives in a castle far detached from the average person on the street. Phrases like "Tory Boy Timpson" and "Timpson the toff" have been bandied around in their campaign leaflets.

Conveniently they omit to mention that Dunwoody herself lives in a Welsh mansion set in large private grounds miles away from the constituency.

Whilst it may be true that Edward is a barrister and lives a comfortable lifestyle, it's certainly not that he was born with a silver spoon in his mouth. He's a self made man - he studied and worked hard to get to where he is today and has done a lot of good for a lot of people along the way.

The way the Labour Party is vilifying his upbringing and poking fun at his family - all exceptionally hardworking and caring Cheshire people - is crass beyond belief.

I also think it's a trifle rich that Team Dunwoody has the brass neck to accuse Edward of living off his family's efforts. Take a look in the mirror Tamsin - without your mother you'd be nothing.

Chip Chomping Ants

An army of alien ants is wreaking havoc on electronics owners in Texas.

The exact origin of the ants, nicknamed 'crazy rasberry ants' after the exterminator who discovered them and their erratic motion, is unclear but they're closely related to type of ant found in the Carribean.

For some unknown reason they have been chomping through burglar alarm systems, gas and electricity meters and telephone exchanges. It appears they'll try and eat just about anything electronic. Their overwhelming numbers and ferocious appetite has even managed to render an entire sewerage plant unserviceable, when they targeted its pumps.

The tiny creatures have the authorities concerned as they continue their relentless march towards Nasa's Johnson Space Centre in Houston - one place where you really don't want ants eating your computer components.

The ants also pose a nuisance to farmers because they suck the moisture from plants, feed on precious insects such as ladybirds and eat the hatchlings of a small, endangered type of grouse known as the Attwater prairie chicken.

What exactly attracts the ants to electronics remains unclear, but there is speculation that they are drawn towards magnetic fields.

I'm feeling all itchy just thinking about it!

Crewe and Nantwich - The Runners and Riders

There's just under a week until the pivotal Crewe and Nantwich by-election. The poor people of the constituency are being bamboozled with information as each of the main parties reach a campaigning frenzy.

Despite the frenetic political activity most people in Crewe and Nantwich don't know the full story about the by-election. Today I reveal one more piece of the jigsaw by giving the low down on the Crewe and Nantwich runners and riders. I'll try not to make it too long-winded!

(Candidates appear in alphabetical order of surname)

Nick "the Flying Brick" Delves, Monster Raving Loony Party:

The Flying Brick, Shadow Minister for the Abolition of Gravity, has chosen transport and education as his main campaign issues.

He would open a brand new train-spotting university and banish cars from the constituency. The inherent transport problems associated with banning cars would be overcome by linking residences with their own private rail network.

Unlike the other candidates the Flying Brick also considers sport and recreation. He would introduce Piranha to the River Weaver to make angling more of a spectator sport. This will boost tourism and create new jobs in Leighton Hospital.

Tamsin Dunwoody, Labour:

Tamsin, daughter of the late Gwynneth, grew up with the Labour Party in her blood. Just like her mother she considers herself to be a strong and independent-minded lady, who isn't afraid of grasping the nettle.

She has been a Labour activist in and around Crewe all her life bar for a four-year stint on the Welsh Assembly Government. Tamsin still lives over the border in Wales.

A nurse by profession Tamsin has a keen interest in local health care. Being a mother of five family values are also high up on Tamsin's agenda, as is tackling anti-social behaviour and local unemployment.

Gemma Garrett, Beauties for Britain:

Gemma is the current Miss Great Britain and Miss Belfast.

As a model she has appeared in a host of national newspapers as well as lads mags like Zoo.

As for her politics, who knows?!

Mike Nattrass, UKIP:

Mike represents the West Midlands in the European Parliament.

He was born in Yorkshire and has family from the Black Country.

Being the UKIP candidate Mike is keen to get into Westminster in an attempt to cut the unnecessary bureaucracy of the EU machine.

David Roberts, English Democrats:

David, who lives in Cheshire, seems to be campaigning about the shabby treatment the people of Crewe and Nantwich receive compared to their neighbours in Wales.

The English Democrats would like English people to be treated fairly and equally with the people of Wales. To this end they are campaigning for an English Parliament.

Elizabeth Shenton, Liberal Democrats:

Elizabeth has a long pedigree when it comes to dabbling in local politics. Since 2006 she has been a Liberal Democrat councillor in neighbouring Newcastle-under-Lyme.

Elizabeth has spent much of her life working in the financial sector. She climbed the ranks of the RBS group to become the director of their pensions board.

If she wins she pledges to cut crime, improve schools and protect the local environment.

Elizabeth and her husband Tim are passionate about animal welfare and actively support a number of animal charities.

Robert Smith, Green Party:

Robert is a 23-year-old planning official who lives in Merseyside.

His main area of concern is transport around the Crewe and Nantwich area.

Robert argues that rail privatisation has had a negative effect on Crewe and Nantwich and that taking the rail network back into public ownership would be better for local people and the environment.

Paul Thorogood, Cut Tax on Diesel and Petrol:

Information about Paul is thin on the ground, although he seems to be running a single-issue campaign about the excessive price of fuel.

A noble cause.

Edward Timpson, Conservatives:

Edward and his family were born and raised in Cheshire.

Edward studied politics at Durham before converting to law. He is now a barrister specialising in family law.

Edward has been an active campaigner on many local issues. He has a particularly keen interest in the health care provision of Leighton Hospital, where all three of his children were born. Edward has also completed 6 charity marathons, with some of the proceeds going towards the Macmillan cancer unit at the hospital.

Not surprisingly for a married man with young children family values are a key priority for Edward. His campaign is focusing on three key areas: the cost of living, cutting crime and the provision of better local services.

His father John is head of the shoe repairing and key cutting business bearing the family name.

Mark Walklate, Independent:

Mark, an ex-Conservative, has branded himself as the only truly local candidate in the Crewe and Nantwich by-election.

Mark is an apparently well-rounded individual with many informed opinions on different aspects of local and national politics.

His policies revolve are the key issues of affordable housing, cutting crime and fairer taxation.

Alnwick Petrol Racket

Willowtree Service Station (photo taken 15 May 08).

I'm scratching my head here in amazement that petrol prices in Alnwick are a whole 5 pence per litre more than those in Seahouses.

In Alnwick the price of unleaded petrol at both the Willowtree Service Station and Willis of Alnwick is currently 112.9 pence per litre. In Seahouses the price of unleaded petrol at the King Street Garage is currently 107.9 pence per litre.

For the average family car that means that a full tank of fuel (50 litres) in Alnwick costs £2.50 more than the same fuel in Seahouses. That's quite a difference considering the distance between the two towns is only 13 miles as the crow flies. That's about a £130 annual difference based on today's prices - things will only get worse as the year progresses.

If from reading this you're thinking that the petrol users of Alnwick are being hard done by then spare a thought for the poor diesel users. Diesel at both the town's stations costs a whopping 125.9 pence per litre - an entire 10 pence more than the price at Seahouses.

Willis of Alnwick (photo taken 15 May 08).

Put another way that means the average diesel user is paying an extra £260 per year for their fuel just for the privilege of filling up in Alnwick. Based on the fact that the garage at Seahouses must be in profit, that's at least £260 pure profit into the pockets of the mercenary petrol retailers of the town.

How is this so? Alnwick is right on the main A1 trunk road with good transport links both north and south, whereas Seahouses is right on the coast and slightly off the beaten track. Could Alnwick's additional overheads - whatever they are - really justify stinging the motorist for at least an extra £2.50 per tank? I don't think so.

There is only one explanation I can think of - price fixing. There has long been speculation that the two petrol retailers in the town are in cahoots - indeed, the way fuel prices are choreographed between their stations is too slick to be coincidental. Drive anywhere else in Northumberland and you'll struggle to find fuel as expensive.

The Alnwick petrol stations charge more for their fuel because they know they can. People have little choice but to drive given that the local public transport is virtually non-existent.

They also know that most people will pay an extra 5 or 10 pence per litre rather than drive for 20 minutes to find the nearest alternative.

It's nothing more than profiteering in its lowest form.

Gloom on the Housing Front

Caroline Flint, the Housing Minister, has made an embarrassing blunder by revealing notes that highlight the Government's concerns about the state of the housing market.

An image of the notes was obtained by an Eagle-eyed photographer as Ms Flint walked into 10 Downing Street for this morning's routine Cabinet meeting. She had been carrying the notes in a transparent plastic folder when the waiting media snatched a sneaky peek at the front page.


The notes give a candid appraisal of the state of the market, with house prices expected to fall by 5-10% at best year-on-year. The notes also confirm that the number of repossessions is on the increase and that no-one knows how bad the downturn in the market will be.

A recent study by the Royal Institute of Chartered Surveyors (RICS) puts the UK housing market in its worst state in more than 30 years. RICS say that 82% of estate agencies are reporting property price falls, compared to just one percent reporting price rises.

The combination of crippling interest rates and falling property prices gives rise to the real concern that mortgage holders will fall into negative equity.

Now is probably an opportune moment to sell. It's a pity that most people are too poor to be in a position to buy!

Does Not Compute

The Chancellor made an emergency statement to the House of Commons this afternoon where he announced changes to the basic rate of income tax that will see most Britons better off to the tune of £120 this year.

Alistair Darling's £2.7 billion giveaway was a desperate measure to calm disquiet about the 10 pence tax debacle that proved so costly to the Government in the council elections at the beginning of May.

The Chancellor reckons that 22 million people on low and middle incomes will benefit from the Government's decision to raise the personal tax allowance by £600.

But the devil is in the detail. The figures haven't yet been sufficiently pawed over by the Opposition number crunchers to spot who the losers are. Immediately obvious from the Chancellor's statement is that it is a one-off, unsustainable damage limitation exercise.

The inescapable fact is that the global economic slow down, high cost of borrowing and spiralling rate of inflation mean that the Government can't afford to just give away the best part of £3 billion - desperate as they may be. Someone, somewhere will have to pay for it.

No doubt it'll all become clearer in the next few days.

Hard Selling

Today's post stems from a cold call I received from British Gas. I don't take well to cold calls at the best of times, but calls where the person on the other end just doesn't pay any notice really grind my gears.

The chap on the end of the phone this morning wanted me to switch from my current gas and electricity supplier back to British Gas. Within the first sentence I had established who he represented and that I wasn't interested in his company or any service they had to offer. Unperturbed the persistent little blighter kept yapping away completely oblivious to my boredom.

He told me that British Gas was by far the cheapest supplier in our area - a bare-faced lie. It's also quite an unusual statement to make given that none of the energy suppliers charge on a geographical basis. He also said that it was wrong that we should be paying much more for our power than other people on the same street.

Curiously he omitted to mention today's announcement by Centrica, British Gas' parent company, that they intend to: "take the necessary action to deliver reasonable margins in the retail business." Or increase prices to safeguard their profit margin as people tend to say in plain English. He also failed to mention that Energywatch, the independent gas and electricity watchdog, received more complaints about British Gas than any other energy supplier last year.

British Gas sucks big time. In fact I'd go so far as to say their inferior quality of service and customer care make it a disgrace that they're still allowed to carry the 'British' name.

A Desperately Slow Day for News

Apparently the former Prime Minister's wife - a woman of no redeeming features whatsoever - is writing a book about her life. Curiously this is deemed so newsworthy that it appears on the front pages of some of today's newspapers.

A quick skim through the edited highlights reveals that it's not really about Cherie Blair's life at all - more about the increasingly bitter relationship between her husband and other members of the Cabinet.

It shouldn't come as any surprise that Mrs Blair - a woman so devoid of morals that she brazenly lied about having a convicted fraudster arrange her property deals - is having one last gasp attempt at cashing in on her husband's former public office.

I encourage you not to buy it.

More Gloomy News for Brown

Just when the Prime Minister thought things couldn't get any worse an opinion poll puts Labour on an abysmal 23% share of the vote - less than half that of the Conservatives.

The YouGov poll, to be published in tomorrow's The Sun newspaper, will make very grim reading for Gordon Brown after Labour only managed to poll 24% of the vote in last week's council elections. Labour has never polled as badly as that since records began in the 1930s. The only time in history the Conservatives had a bigger lead was in 1968.

The Liberal Democrats, whoever they are, have a 17% approval rating in tomorrow's poll.

Maybe we will have a clean sweep at Crewe and Nantwich after all.

Cannabis Re-Reclassified

The Home Secretary, Jacqui Smith, today announced the Government's intention to re-reclassify cannabis from a class C to a class B drug.

Cannabis had always been a class B drug until 2004 when the then Home Secretary, David Blunkett, decided it should be reclassified to class C in an attempt to free up police resources and allow them to concentrate on more serious crime.

For what it's worth I think the Government has made the right decision today - but that decision wouldn't have to be made at all if it wasn't for the poor judgement of Blunkett back then.

I have always been vehemently and vocally opposed to the downgrading of cannabis to class C status. It was a decision that led to confusion on the street about what the legalities of possessing the drug actually were. It left a swathe of the population under the misapprehension that cannabis had been decriminalised and that people who possessed it would not be dealt with by the law.

Furthermore, by downgrading cannabis to class C, the Government were implying that the physiological and social effects of the drug weren't as bad as previously thought. Could the same be true of class A drugs like heroine, cocaine and ecstasy?

To coin a phrase from American Pie I have always considered the use of cannabis as like banging a ball off a wall. I imagine it gives a certain degree of satisfaction to begin with but after not too long a person gets bored and seeks more exciting pursuits. I believe cannabis is like that - where's the adventure if you can walk into any pub in any town and buy it for a few quid? It is the start of the journey on the treacherous path of experimentation. Ask yourself how many class A addicts started off on cannabis and then graduated to their current fix - it's quite a lot.

So how has drug crime changed over the past four years since the police put cannabis on the back burner and targeted their resources at the harder stuff? Some of the most recent figures released by the British Crime Survey - an independent study that gauges the true extent of crime from the accounts of victims rather than manipulated police detection rates - show that drug related offences have actually increased by 14% in the year June 2006 to June 2007.

No surprises there then that Blunkett's logic was actually flawed from the outset. Four years of cannabis users and dealers blatantly peddling their trade on the streets and not one iota of benefit to show for it.

Tough on crime, tough on the causes of crime? My arse.

Monitor Kaput

It's been another day of technological mayhem in the Jackson household as yet another part of my big computer failed. After weeks of annoying hiccups my old cathode ray tube monitor (anyone remember them?) finally gave up the ghost this morning. Truth is I've been wanting to replace it for a while but never got around to it.

The upshot is I'm relegated to using my antiquated Acer Travelmate circa 2000 today and I'm not particularly chuffed about it. It performs with the same slickness as Labour in the recent council elections. It too is high up on my replacement list, hopefully within the next few weeks.

I anticipate having purchased a big TFT monitor by this evening so look forward to a post about the re-reclassification of cannabis.

I bet you can't wait!

There's Carrier Bags and There's M&S Carrier Bags

UK retail giant Marks and Spencer has become the first major high street store to begin charging for its standard plastic carrier bags.

From today M&S customers will have to pay 5 pence for every cheap and nasty carrier bag they use to pack their shopping. The move comes in response to the Daily Mail's high profile campaign to banish the bags altogether in favour of reusable alternatives.

In his last Budget the Chancellor of the Exchequer, Alistair Campbell, hinted that unless the high street stores did more to reduce the use of their standard bags the Government would take action to compel them to.

There is widespread concern among environmentalists at the damage discarded bags do to nature. The Mail has carried a number of graphic images to highlight the impact of plastic bags on marine life.


Some 13 billion carrier bags, each of which take hundreds of years to decompose, are given away to UK shoppers each year.

Back in 2002 the Irish Government levied taxation on carrier bags, which saw the number of discarded bags fall by 90%. The charge in Ireland currently stands at around 16 pence per bag, which has driven down the average annual usage from 328 to 21 bags per head of population.

In the past I have written about the conscientious attitude Marks and Spencer has shown towards reducing packaging and the use of environmentally friendly alternatives to plastic. The company is currently running a major advertising campaign highlighting the removal of artificial colourings from their entire range of own brand produce.


Marks and Spencer is to be commended yet again on their wholesome approach to tackling carrier bags. Other stores take note.

Taxing Times

The issue of Gordon Brown's 10 pence tax snatch is still producing uncomfortable headlines for the Government at the moment.

In his monthly news conference David Cameron, leader of the Conservatives, faced a barrage of questions about how he would manage the 10 pence debacle if he was in Brown's shoes at the moment.

The truth is it's very difficult for Mr Cameron to answer that question because the Conservatives would never have ended up in this predicament. I can not envisage a situation where the Conservatives would cut by more than half the income tax of 5.3 million people. Such an action is reckless, unsustainable and bordering on financial incompetence - perfectly highlighted by the PM's decision to backtrack on the idea.

Sure, such an announcement allows the Government benches to frantically wave their ballot papers in a moment of orgasmic one-upmanship, but when you delve a little deeper into the fabric of the policy - a policy that cost the UK's already strained Exchequer billions in lost revenue each year - you realise just how superficial it really was.

Times have changed and the Government is now on the back foot. Rumour has it that this morning's Cabinet meeting - the first since Labour was massacred in councils up and down the land - saw the PM ripping up plans for yet more taxation on householders and car drivers.

The Government is running scared - it has been substantially weakened by the apathy of its own supporters and the resolve of the Conservatives. Weak government is not an attractive proposition - it leads to governance for the sake of popularity rather than governance for the sake of the nation.

Crewe and Nantwich and Henley

Crewe and Nantwich and Henley are two UK Parliamentary constituencies that are coming up for by-election shortly. The results in these constituencies will be another key indicator of the sway in public approval away from the Government.

Henley has been a Conservative stronghold for almost a century. The incumbent Member of Parliament, Boris Johnson, has just been elected as the new Mayor of London and will stand down as MP as soon as an orderly transition can be organised. Boris is a hugely popular figure within the constituency, commanding a 53% of the vote in the 2005 General Election - an improvement of more than 7% on the 2001 result. For the Conservatives to lose Henley is almost unthinkable - it's just not going to happen.

The real testing ground is going to be 150 miles north west in the Crewe and Nantwich constituency. This constituency has recently been vacated by the death of the hugely popular Labour MP Gwyneth Dunwoody. Dunwoody, MP since the constituency was created in 1983, was held in very high regard in the area because of her keen interest in local affairs and her no nonsense approach to Westminster business. That said, Dunwoody's huge share of the vote had swung gradually towards the Conservatives over the last decade.

Many people have commented that it was Dunwoody's persona that kept her in place and not her lifelong association with the Labour Party. This being the case the Conservatives should really make a dent in the Labour vote come polling day. The Liberal Democrats barely feature.

But the canny Crewe and Nantwich Labour Association has chosen Tamsin Dunwoody, Gwyneth's daughter, to stand as their candidate in the by-election. This will undoubtedly lead to a lot of voters giving her a sympathetic ear and probably a sympathetic vote too as they reflect back on the Dunwoody wonder years. The Conservatives are fielding Edward Timpson as their candidate.

It will be interesting to see how the Conservative share of the vote changes on 22 May.

Insomnia

My sleep pattern is completely out of kilter at the moment after two very late nights watching the election results roll in.

The truth is I'm not a particularly good sleeper at the best of times. I normally end up rolling around until early in the morning before I eventually manage to nod off. Sometimes the dawn chorus beats me to my slumber, which is quite a worrying state of affairs considering I've usually been in bed for at least 4 or 5 hours by that point. It's only when you hear birds in the absence of background noise that you appreciate what noisy little buggers they can be.

I might have to resort to counting sheep and boring myself to sleep. Some would say boring myself to sleep shouldn't be too difficult!

Boris Wins London Mayoral Contest

Boris Johnson - the new Conservative Mayor of London.

The Conservatives have claimed the last blood of Thursday's elections with the widely anticipated announcement that Boris Johnson has won the race to become Mayor of London.

The final results of the Mayoral poll were as follows:

First preferences:

• Boris Johnson (Conservatives): 43% (1,043,761)
  
• Ken Livingstone (Labour): 37% (893,877)
  
• Brian Paddick (Liberal Democrats): 10% (236,685)
  

Second preferences:

• Boris Johnson (Conservatives): 124,977
  
• Ken Livingstone (Labour): 135,089
  

Cumulative votes:

• Boris Johnson (Conservatives): 1,168,738
• Ken Livingstone (Labour): 1,028,966
  

It's fair to say that Red Ken has been lagging behind Boris since the count started - the only real uncertainty was the final extent of the Conservative victory. As for Brian Paddick, he didn't even get out of the starting blocks.

Conservative voters in the leafy suburbs flocked to the polling stations to bring Boris home. On the other hand many Labour supporters were too lethargic to brave yesterday's showers and support their man.

So confident were they of the result that bookmakers Paddy Power started paying out on a Boris victory at around lunchtime - well in advance of this evening's final confirmation. In another vote of confidence the night edition of the Evening Standard went to press with the unequivocal front page headline: "Boris is the Mayor".

The London result comes as a final bitter blow to the maligned Labour Government and reinforces the nation's displeasure with their current economic performance.

No doubt the Prime Minister will be in deep contemplation this weekend about how, against the odds, he managed to drag the Party down to their lowest poll results in more than 40 years. How did he manage to alienate voters in Labour's traditional heartlands? He will also be considering how to turn the Party's fortunes around before the next General Elections, which he is now expected to desperately cling onto until mid-2010.

The country has spoken and the bludgeoned Labour Government lies writhing in the gutter. It's time for change. It's time for the Conservatives. We are ready.

Labour Massacred in Northumberland Council Elections

The ruling Labour group has been spectacularly ousted from power in yesterday's election for the new unitary Northumberland Council.

But unlike elsewhere in the country it wasn't the Conservatives that were the prime beneficiary of the Government's unpopularity, but rather the Liberal Democrats that made impressive inroads in England's most northerly county.

The balance of power at the council is now as follows:

• Conservatives: 17 (+3)
• Labour: 17 (-18)
• Liberal Democrats: 26 (+12)
• Independent: 7 (+3)

The election leaves the council in no overall control. It is highly likely that the Conservatives and Independents will form a coalition opposition, leaving the formerly ruling Labour group languishing in third place. The result, with Labour losing more than half of its councillors, represents a truly dramatic change in voter opinion since the 2005 elections.

More coverage of the Northumberland results can be found on the council's website.

Brown in a Pickle

It's been a disastrous night for the Labour Party by anyone's measure. With 59 councils (about 1/3) still to declare the situation is as follows:

• Conservatives: +8 councils, +146 councillors
• Labour: -6 councils, -163 councillors
• Liberal Democrats: -1 council, +11 councillors

Another interesting statistic generated from last night's result is the share of the national vote that each party would have received had it been a General Election. Those results are as follows:

• Conservatives: 44%
• Liberal Democrats: 25%
• Labour: 24%

That is the worst showing by Labour in living memory. Being beaten into third place by the Liberal Democrats - things don't get much worse than that. If that vote share was repeated in a General Election it would see a Conservative landslide with a 150+ majority.

It's been very entertaining watching senior Labour figures trying to sum up their election performance without sounding too downtrodden. Geoff Hoon, Labour MP for Ashfield and Government Chief Whip, tried to explain the heavy losses experienced by Labour.

It was embarrassing viewing - something along the lines of: "Our supporters didn't bother voting, some traditional Labour supporters voted Liberal Democrat instead and that benefited the Conservatives." He couldn't bring himself to state the glaringly obvious and indisputable fact that: "People who usually support us have become disillusioned and turned to the Conservatives instead."

One national factor seems to have been hugely influential at the ballot boxes - the current state of the economy. Harriet Harman, Labour Deputy Leader, told the BBC: "Well I think that we all think these are disappointing results and we recognise the difficult economic context with people feeling the pinch. We recognise too, the part that the 10p tax rate change has played in that. But I think that we're determined to listen and confident to take the country forward. And we do expect that there will be more scrutiny on the Tories' policies and I think that the shallowness and the hollowness of them will be exposed."

All eyes now switch to the race to become London Mayor. A new computerised way of vote counting means that the result won't be known until this afternoon. The omens and good for the Boris Johnson campaign. Conservative blogger Iain Dale reported last night that there had been huge turnouts in Outer London Boroughs that traditionally support the Conservatives. This, combined with obvious widespread disaffection towards the incumbent Government, could be enough to swing the vote to Boris in the first round.

Race for London Mayor: Exit Poll Results

Big drum roll....
The first results of the Tom Jackson Online London Mayoral Exit Poll are now in. They show the following:


Boris Johnson, Conservative, 58%
Ken Livingston, Labour, 38%
Brian Paddick, Liberal Democrats, 4%

Our poll opened 12 pm and the results shown were collected at 10 pm to correspond to the official close of polling.

Number of non-UK visitors: 152
Number of UK visitors: 103
Number of non-UK poll voters: 9
Number of UK poll voters: 41
Turnout of UK poll voters: 40%

Not exactly a scientific analysis but the best I can do by filtering out all the non-UK traffic and votes. Our poll, small and humble as it is, does seem to echo the opinion elsewhere that Boris Johnson has done well at the expense of Ken Livingston.

UPDATE: Due to a last minute flurry of visits I shall publish an updated exit poll tomorrow. Please keep voting.

London Mayoral Exit Poll

Not quite an exit poll, but the closest thing I can do on this blog.

If you are a Londoner please tell us who you have voted or intend to vote for. If you're not a Londoner please tell us who you would vote for given the chance.

One response only. Poll options appear in random order each time the page is refreshed. The poll will close late this evening around the same time as the polling stations.

The official polls closed at 10 pm UK time. Results at the official close of polling are published here.

Please continue to vote and we will publish an update tomorrow before the official result is declared.

Opinion Polls & Market Research

Don't Forget to Leave Your Mark

Just a quick reminder that today is polling day for the Local Government elections in England and Wales. Additionally Londoners get to vote on who they want to see as Mayor of the capital.

At stake are around 4,000 seats on 159 authorities. Some of the seats are being filled for the first time in preparation for the Government's shake up of local authorities planned for next year. Northumberland is such a case, where the current six District Councils will be abolished and their responsibilities taken on by a brand new souped-up County Council.

However disillusioned you are with politics it's important that you make the effort to get to the polling station and make your voice heard. Apathy is a dangerous thing when it comes to elections and it allows extremist parties to get a foothold where they otherwise wouldn't. Consider how much the people of Zimbabwe would like to express their political views in a fair electoral process.

As soon as I've drank my coffee I'll be off to vote myself.

Full coverage of the election results will be broadcast on Sky News from 10.30 pm and BBC1 from 11.35 pm. Expect the usual dazzling array of funky graphics and indepth commentary from the usual political pundits.

A quick heads up that I have commissioned a special cartoon of Gordon Brown for tomorrow's article about his election hammering!