Taxman Loses Personal Data

Alistair Darling (they really are his eyebrows).

Whenever people ask me about the idea of a compulsory ID card for British nationals I'm always vehemently against the idea. They argue that an ID card, complete with a vast array of personal biometric data, can only be of benefit in the fight against crime and uncontrollable immigration. Their favourite saying to me: "If you've got nothing to hide what are you worried about?"

I haven't got anything to hide - in fact, as those who know me best will testify, I have one of the most uninteresting and unexciting lives possible. But it's my life, as uninteresting as it may be. I don't want the authorities to be able to spy on every move I make - we live in an invasive society where people are spied on quite enough already. As I once mentioned in a previous article the average person walking through a busy town or city will be caught on no fewer than 300 different CCTV cameras. The UK, a small nation with only 1% of the global population, boasts a disproportionately high 20% of the world's total CCTV cameras.

My main retort to the "what have you got to hide?" argument is that the government has a very lackadaisical attitude when it comes to protecting the private information of law abiding individuals. History has told us that for the right price the government is prepared to sell out the British people - just look at the DVLA selling drivers details to insurance companies and the former Department for Constitutional Affairs (now part of the Ministry of Justice) selling off unpaid fines to private debt-recovery agencies.

News today further reinforces my concerns about the government's lack lustre approach to handing confidential information. The Chancellor the Exchequer, Alistair Darling, is due to make a statement to the House of Commons explaining how one of his departments, Her Majestys' Revenue and Customs (HMRC), managed to lose computer discs containing the personal records of 15 million British people. The discs contained the names, home addresses and bank account details of child benefit claimants.

The Chancellor is due to speak at 3.30 pm and I'll be very interested to see how he attempts to make right this grave act of incompetence. The government can not be trusted on ID cards.

Nail Gun Fantasist

Nail gun 'victim' David Russell.

A man who repeated shot himself with a nail gun in an attempt to claim compensation has pleaded guilty to perverting the course of justice and been imprisoned for two and a half years.

David Russell, 38, of Gloucester told police that he had been attacked by a gang of three youths outside his Widden Street home near the city centre.

According to Russell the gang had grabbed him from behind, swung him around and fired five nails into his chest. As he stumbled backwards he swung out in self-defence and caught two more nails in his arm.

To add credence to his story Russell spoke to reporters as he lay in his hospital bed. He claimed the attack was "like some kind of sick joke for these kids".

"These people must be caught and punished. It could have been my wife with our baby or anyone else innocently minding their own business," he added.

Russell attempted to claim compensation after telling the authorities that the 11th August attack had left him unable to work. But the audacious deception began to unravel. Police became suspicious when it transpired that Russell had made an almost identical claim, for which he was awarded £4000 in compensation, only three years earlier when he lived in Bristol.

Julian Kesner, on behalf of the Crown, told Gloucester Crown Court: "He injured himself twice, was operated on twice and, in connection with the first incident received over £4,000 from the criminal (injuries) compensation board."

Nail gun attacks are rarer than hen's teeth. The same person being involved in two nail gun attacks in the space of only 3 years is beyond belief. He probably would have got away with it if only he had claimed the weapon in the second attack was a hedge trimmer!

DEFRA: H5N1 Bird Flu Confirmed in Suffolk

The Department for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs (DEFRA) has announced the recent bird flu outbreak in Suffolk is the highly virulent H5N1 strain of the disease.

The Acting Chief Veterinary Officer, Dr. Fred Landeg, confirmed that the deadly strain of the disease, which has been transmitted to humans in the far east, was responsible for the death of hundreds of birds on a poultry farm near Diss in Suffolk.

Unlike the previous outbreak back in February, where diseased turkeys were brought by road from the continent, the source of the current outbreak is still uncertain. There is a real fear that the virus may have been transmitted by wild birds, which gives rise to the possibility it may be a widespread problem.

Farmers are being urged to remain vigilant. Remember the signs from my previous article:

New Motto for Britain

There's a very interesting discussion going on over at the Sky News website at the moment. It's in relation to recent reports that Gordon Brown wants Britain to adopt a new national motto to adorn public buildings - much like the France's "Liberty, Equality, Fraternity".

This has also been discussed on the BBC News website so, in an effort to bring more low-maintenance (I'm busy) content to my blog, I post below some of the more humorous soundbites suggested by the viewers:

• Smile! You're on CCTV.
• It never rains but it pours.
• Big Brother is watching you.
• Honi soit qui fume (Shamed be the person who smokes).
• United in irony.
• The land of political correctness.
• In 'Gord' we trust.
• Give me my benefits.
• Land of the paid. Home of the financially enslaved.
• Lie back and think of the world.
• May contain Nuts.
• The United Kingdom - a subsidiary of the United States.
• The door's open, please come in!
• Britain - It sucks but we can't afford to move to Australia.
• Your logo here for £1m.
• Two World Wars and one World Cup.
• Will the last person out please turn off the lights.
• Image over substance.
• Now under Scottish rule.
• We apologise for any offence caused by this motto.
• Where's our share of global warming?
• Don't let the bastards grind you down.
• Get out while you've still got the chance.
• Aspiring to adequacy.
• Free to all, unless you live here.
• Drink when not thirsty, fight when not at war.
• Come on in, the welfare's lovely.
• Paid for by the English, undermined by the Scots, laughed at by the world.

And my absolute favourite: English jobs for Scottish politicians.
They're obviously a creative bunch!

Britain's Most Ludicrous Laws

Back in the good old days of law and order.

I'm conscious of the fact that I've been neglecting my blogging recently, mainly because November is going to be a very busy month for me. I've been scouring the net to find a lightweight, tongue-in-cheek story to help fill the void and this is what I came up with: Britain's 10 Most Ludicrous Laws.

UK digital TV channel UKTV Gold used Nigel Cawthorne's book 'The Strange Laws of Old England' to draw up a shortlist of weird and wacky British legislation. The list was put to a 4000 strong panel, 27% of whom decided that legislation outlawing someone dying in the Houses of Parliament was the most absurd.

Other ludicrous laws that made it to the list:

• It is illegal to die in the Houses of Parliament.
• It could be regarded an act of treason to place a postage stamp bearing the British king or queen's image upside-down.
• Eating mince pies on Christmas Day is banned.
• In the UK, a pregnant woman can legally relieve herself anywhere she wants.
• The head of any dead whale found on the British coast automatically becomes the property of the King, and the tail of the Queen.
• It is illegal not to tell the tax man anything you do not want him to know, but legal not to tell him information you do not mind him knowing.
• It is illegal to enter the Houses of Parliament wearing a suit of armour.

They're obviously only considering historic laws because if they factored contemporary legislation into the equation, a lot of which is poorly written and unenforceable, they'd need a much bigger list.

I'll try and write some more later in the month, but no promises.

The Worrying Tale of Fran Lyon

Pregnant Northumberland woman Fran Lyon (pictured left) appeared on ITV's This Morning show earlier today. Fran, 22, had mental health problems as a teenager which led to her self-harming and being hospitalised.

Fran has made great progress over the last 6 or 7 years but her medical history has left social workers concerned that she may harm her daughter, already known as Molly, if she develops Munchausen's Syndrome by proxy after the child's birth.

Whatever Munchausen's Syndrome by proxy is - the medical community can't even agree on whether it actually exists.

I've been aware of Fran's story for the last couple of months, having heard all about it from the regional newspapers and television news. Each time I learn more my anger at the ignorance, arrogance of Northumberland County Council intensifies. Fran now leads a normal life in the affluent market town of Hexham. She lives in a pleasant home, with a steady job, good education and rosy outlook on her daughter's birth and impending motherhood. She longs to be a mother and her home is littered with soft toys and baby clothing in preparation for the big day.

But Northumberland County Council social workers plan to snatch Molly from her mother within hours of her birth. Arrangements have already been made for the County Council's case for an emergency protection order, based on the evidence an inexperienced doctor who has never met Fran, to be brought before Hexham magistrates on the very same day.

Given the County Council's assertions about Fran's future mental health you might think it prudent that they consult a psychiatrist on the case. Well apparently a paediatrician would do just as well and the authority employed Dr Martin Ward Platt in the role.

Speaking to the Telegraph Fran said: "He is not a psychiatrist and cannot possibly make assertions about my current or future mental health. Yet his letter was the only one considered in the case conference on August 16 which lasted just 10 minutes."

Fran's own consultant psychiatrist, Dr Stella Newrith, wrote to the council saying: "There has never been any clinical evidence to suggest that Fran would put herself or others at risk, and there is certainly no evidence to suggest that she would put a child at risk of emotional, physical or sexual harm.

Dr Newrith, who has known Fran for several years, added: "I would view the removal of Fran's baby as an extraordinarily heavy-handed gesture. It is also my professional opinion that doing so would be an infringement of Fran's human rights, as it would be much the same as removing a child from someone from the general population."

BBC Look North (NE & Cumbria) report, 12th Sept 2007:


Liberal Democrat MP John Hemming, chairman of the Justice for Families working group, is taking up Fran's case. Also speaking to the Telegraph Mr Hemming said: "There is absolutely no evidence that Fran would harm her child. However, a vague letter from a paediatrician who has never met her has been used in a decision to remove her baby at birth, while evidence from professionals treating her, that she would have no problems has been ignored."

Read John Hemming's blog entry for his take on the latest developments.