Halloween

Tonight, as the incessant ringing of my doorbell will testify, is Halloween. I hate Halloween. I am unable to sit down, relax and enjoy the comfort of my home for the endless stream of waifs and strays under the misguided impression that it is acceptable to come begging at my door. It is wholly unacceptable for anyone to go begging at anyone else's door here in the UK - indeed it is illegal to do so.

I'm probably sounding like a right old fuddy-duddy but I really believe the significance of Halloween - the evening before All Saint's Day, when Christians remember loved ones who have emigrated to the Kingdom of Heaven - is completely lost on the gangs of teenagers who roam the cold, moonlit streets. They see it as no more than a money spinner - an opportunity to go and capitalise from people they neither know nor care about. A 99 pence mask and the words "trick or treat" or "penny for Halloween" and these urchins seem to think they're entitled to leave pensioners cowering in their own homes, babies unable to get to sleep and a wake of destruction behind them.

Yet more Christian values that have been trodden into the ground by the onset of commercialism.

Anyway, on a lighter note David Platt is (hopefully) going to top himself on Coronation Street!

Facebook Identity Fraud

Mark Zuckerberg - founder of Facebook.

Millions of members of social networking site Facebook are leaving themselves open to identity fraud according to internet security company Sophos.

Graham Cluely, a senior technology consultant at Sophos, commented that: "There is an Oprah mentality to some of these sites – people let it all hang out, and update their information minute by minute."

Facebook has come a long way since its launch in 2004. Founded by Harvard student Mark Zuckerberg the network was originally targeted at US students. Within a year the network was open to any student worldwide who had an academic email address. The network was further expanded in September 2006, when Facebook became available to anyone with an email address subject to a minimum age limit of thirteen.

As a result the popularity of Facebook has absolutely rocketed over the last 12 months with the network now boasting 42 million active members worldwide, 3.5 million of whom are in the UK. Not surprisingly this massive loyal following has pushed it to the seventh most popular site on the web, according to traffic analysis company Alexa.

Facebook storms up the Alexa rankings.

Each Facebook member creates a profile, quite often including details about their date of birth, home location, education and employment background - all valuable information to a potential identity thief. The information given on Facebook might seem trivial in itself but combined with other resources on the internet - the electoral register being the most obvious - it can be used to create a credible second identity of the unsuspecting victim.

As an illustration of how easy this is consider the following facts:

• For a small fee anyone can order a duplicate birth certificate of any other person born in the UK. Anyone can turn up in person and pay in cash for this service.
  
• A passport can be obtained by providing a copy of a birth certificate and a photograph authenticated by a 'person of standing'.
• A driving licence can be obtained by providing a passport and a photograph authenticated by a 'person of standing'.
• A bank account can be opened or credit obtained by using a passport or driving licence as proof of identity.

I use the phrase 'person of standing' in inverted commas because this can vary anywhere between the local Member of Parliament and the local shopkeeper. Even I've been asked to sign quite a few driving licence and passport applications and not once have the authorities made any attempt to verify my credentials - granted that might be because I always sign in my capacity as a government worker.

According to APACS, an organisation representing UK payment providers, online banking fraud rose to £33.5 million in 2006 - an increase of 44% over the previous year. Meanwhile internet shopping fraud amounted to £155 million and identity fraud as a whole costs the UK economy a staggering £1.7 billion each year.

A UK driving licence - also available in Scotland.

A spokesman for the British Bankers Association (BBA) warned that: "Anything as basic as your address or your date of birth could be used by identity thieves, so [with] anything as basic as that you should beware of broadcasting, and anything more personal than that can be even more help to criminals."

I personally hate Facebook - with a passion. The idea that any old waif or stray in your past life, or not as the case might be, can track you down and invite you to become a friend is nauseating in the extreme. I ended up joining just because I considered it rude to ignore requests of friendship, but I warn you now - if you happen to be one of my Facebook friends don't expect much in the way of a profile or activity!

Royal Sex and Drugs Plot - Suspects Named

Two men at the centre of the recent Royal sex and drugs blackmail plot have been named in today's newspapers. The pair allegedly demanded £50,000 to prevent the release of a videotape starring a member of the British Royal Family.

The Crown Prosecution Service has confirmed the identity of the two suspected blackmailers as Ian Strachan, 30, of Chelsea, and Sean McGuigan, 40, of Battersea.

Strachan, a university-educated businessman and well known figure on London's club scene, claims to socialise on the fringes of the Royal circle. In particular he is believed to have met Prince William, Prince Harry, Zara Phillips and Lord Frederick (Freddie) Windsor.

Less is known about McGuigan, although one of his neighbours is quoted as saying: "He is not the kind of guy I would want to get to know and no one else here would either."

Strachan and McGuigan have been remanded in custody pending an appearance at the Old Bailey on 20th December.

Lawyer Giovanni Di Stefano, representing Strachan, claimed a video of the alleged sex act had never existed. Speaking about the alleged blackmail, Mr Di Stefano said: "I wish to state there is no tape of a sex act in existence. What there is in existence are tapes, both audio and visual, of an assistant to a member of the Royal Family boasting of how the person received a sex act from this Royal - whether that act took place I do not know."

Speculation is rife about the contents of the video, but the latest suggestion is that it shows a royal aide cutting cocaine with a Harrods charge card before snorting it from a coffee table. The aide in question also makes allegations of a sex act which took place between them and a member of the Royal Family, before requesting some more cocaine to snort.

REMEMBER: We're running a poll to see who you think is the Royal involved.

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Conservatives Tackle 'West Lothian Question'

Gateway to a foreign land - the England-Scotland border at Carter Bar
(photo by Ian Britton of FreeFoto.com)

The Conservatives have today announced plans to address the perceived constitutional imbalance caused by Scottish and Welsh devolution. Only English MPs will be allowed to vote on English issues according to the blueprint drawn up by Tory ex-minister Sir Malcolm Rifkind.

The West Lothian question examines whether it is right that Scottish MPs can vote on matters only applicable to England, whereas devolved powers to the Scottish government prevent English MPs from having reciprocal influence on similar matters affecting only Scotland.

The constitutional disparity between England and Scotland has been given further prominence by the Scottish government's recent decision to scrap NHS prescription charges - a move that will cost the NHS an estimated £70 million per annum. Under the Barnett formula – the complex calculation which allocates Treasury funding to Britain's regions – Scotland receives £1,500 more of Government funding per head of population than England each year.

The Conservatives are proposing the establishment of a grand committee voting on areas such as health and education. MPs from all corners of the UK would continue to sit together in the House of Commons to debate UK wide issues like taxation, defence and foreign policy.

Commenting on the proposals Sir Malcolm said: "When the House of Commons is purely discussing English housing or English health or English transport, then why should that not just be left to the English Members of Parliament to decide upon?

"When these matters are being discussed in Northern Ireland or in Scotland, it's the Scots and the Northern Irish who decide these matters - that's what devolution's all about."

It would be up to the Speaker of the House to decide which matters were addressed by the committee of English MPs.

Scottish First Minister Alex Salmond told the BBC's The Andrew Marr show: "I think the right solution is to have a Scottish Parliament and an English Parliament - I believe independent parliaments - and to do the job properly as opposed to having some sort of spatchcocked solution to appeal for votes in middle England."

Labour Deputy Leader Harriet Harman voiced concerns about the proposals. Speaking to the BBC she said: "I think this is a very, very dangerous line of argument that the Conservatives are pushing.

"They used to be the Conservative and Unionist Party and now they are making proposals which wouldn't help strengthen regional accountability in England but would actually, I think, threaten the Union."

A Conservative spokesman confirmed that although the party were giving Sir Malcolm's proposals due consideration it was too early to confirm whether they would be adopted as official party policy.

The latest opinion polls place the Conservatives and Labour on an equal footing at around 40%.

Royal Sex and Drugs Blackmail Plot

A leading member of the British Royal Family has become embroiled in a sex and drugs blackmail plot, according to reports in today's Sunday Times.

The unnamed royal, who can not be identified for legal reasons, called in police after being approached by the blackmailers back in August. The two men demanded £50,000 not to publicise a video which allegedly shows the royal engaged in a sex act.

In another twist to the story the blackmailers also claimed to have video evidence that the royal supplied an aide with an envelope containing cocaine.

Detectives set up a covert operation to trap the pair. They were arrested at Park Lane's Hilton hotel as they unsuspectingly played the video to an undercover detective.

Scotland Yard issued a statement yesterday confirming that: “Two men, a 30-year-old man and a 40-year-old man, appeared at City of Westminster magistrates’ court on September 13, each charged with one count of blackmail.” The judge imposed an order preventing the identification of any of the parties involved.

However, just for fun, we'll have a little poll to see who my readers think the most likely contenders are. After all, with media speculation and press intrusion these things never remain a secret for long.

STOP PRESS: New additions to the poll.

Opinion Polls & Market Research

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Plumbing the Depths of Degradation

Anthony Anderson.

A Hartlepool man has been sentenced to three years imprisonment for his role in a sickening attack which a judge said "plumbed the depths of degradation."

Anthony Anderson, 27, of Raby Road within the town, pleaded guilty to the charge before Hartlepool magistrates last month. Concerned that their sentencing powers were insufficient for the aggravating factors of Anderson's heinous and cowardly crime they referred the case to Teesside Crown Court.

I wrote about the circumstances surrounding the attack last month, but I'll briefly recap the key points now. Anderson and several acquaintances were indulging in drink and drugs when they spotted Christine Lakinski, a 50-year old with a number of medical conditions, carrying a box of laminate flooring home when she fell ill in the street. Anderson thought it humorous to try and rouse the helpless lady, now slumped in her doorway, by kicking at her feet and throwing a bucket of cold water over her. When this failed Anderson urinated and sprayed shaving foam on his seriously ill victim, who sadly died before help came to her aid.

The family of Ms Lakinski have hit out at bystanders who stood by as the attack took place. In a statement read after the verdict the family said: "It beggars belief that these people chose not only to condone his cruelty, but also to walk away from a neighbour who was clearly in distress and needed help.

"We hope that prison will give him time to reflect on his disgusting actions."

Passing sentence Judge Peter Fox said: "You violated this woman in an incredible way and the shocking nature of your acts over a prolonged period of time must mean that a prison sentence of greater length is appropriate in this case."

Three years? What sort of a punishment is that for the sort of filth who robs a defenceless, disabled lady of all dignity as she lies dying in the street? Hopefully Anderson will be beaten like the disgusting animal he is every day he is in prison.

News at Ten Returns

Sir Trevor McDonald fronting News at Ten.

ITV is getting way too much publicity on this blog recently. Only last week I mentioned the unforgivable premium rate telephone rip-offs being perpetrated by the channel's flagship 'family friendly' entertainment show Ant & Dec's Saturday Night Takeaway. I've also written about how Michael Grade, Executive Chairman of ITV plc, wants to make savings by drastically cutting the network's factual regional programming. This would, subject to Ofcom agreement, see the number of regional newsrooms cut from 18 to 9.

It's ITV news making as well as reading the headlines today with the announced return of their most famous bulletin News at Ten. Mr Grade is reported to have said that moving News at Ten had been: "a shocking mistake... it damaged ITV more than anything."

The programme, which ran between 1967 and 1999, was axed to allow the uninterrupted broadcast of movies and drama. It features iconic opening titles punctuated by the chimes (bongs) of Big Ben. After overwhelming public disapproval a watered down version News at Ten reappeared on the schedules back in 2001. The bulletin was shelved yet again in 2003 following poor audience ratings. The current ITV late evening news programme, cruelly dubbed "News at When" because of its flexible transmission time, is usually aired at 10.30 pm.

The famous bongs of Big Ben.

It is expected that the new News at Ten will return early next year and will be fronted by Sir Trevor McDonald and Sky newsreader Julie Etchingham. The programme will go head to head with the BBC's flagship bulletin The Ten O'Clock News.

It'll be nice to see Sir Trevor McDonald back in his natural habitat of newsreading. I still cringe thinking about his uncomfortable brush with satire when he fronted News Knight.

Tram Attacker Spared Jail

Alcoholic Stephen Gordon attacks
defenceless pensioner on tram.

The impotence of the British legal system, in particular grossly inadequate sentencing, has left me on the verge of apoplexy yet again. I am literally incandescent with rage as I thump out this article on my poor old keyboard.

Today 44-year old alcoholic Stephen Gordon was spared a custodial sentence after launching a completely unprovoked attack on a fellow tram passenger in Croydon, South London. Gordon thumped 97-year old Shah Chaudhry, blinding him in one eye, as he stood minding his own business, holding onto a handrail on board the vehicle. His crime? Being in the way of Gordon who was trying to navigate through the sardine tin of passengers.

In the wake of the attack Mr Chaudhry, who had been a sprightly and independent old chap, has been left with deteriorating health and confined to a residential care home. Robbed of his independence and piece of mind by an motiveless attack by an animal.

What could possibly be worse than attacking a defenceless old man who could only walk with the aid of two sticks? Well, uncontent with just stealing Mr Chaudhry's eyesight Gordon also tried to blacken his reputation by falsely accusing him, under oath, of being the aggressor. As chance would have it CCTV evidence, shown above, clearly shows Mr Chaudhry clasping to the handrail with both hands while Gordon hurls a fist towards his face.

Gordon was convicted of grievous bodily harm at Croydon Crown Court. He has just been sentenced to a three year supervision order - well below the maximum sentence of 5 years imprisonment. Thankfully there is some degree of honour even among criminals and I'm sure the crooks of Croydon will be just a sickened by Gordon's actions as everyone else. Hopefully it won't be too long before they dispense their own version of justice on him.

People of Croydon - remember the face
(and bad dental work) of Stephen Gordon.

Yet again the UK justice system has failed the very public it is meant to protect.

Jiggy Bank Robbery

What's happening with ITV at the moment? Last month I reported that ITV plc, the company that owns all of the ITV franchises in England and Wales, was considering halving the number of regional newsrooms in a move that would all but banish sub-regional news opt-outs from the schedules. I mentioned how the company, headed by Executive Chairman Michael Grade, seemed to be at loggerheads with the very foundations, the ethos of the network - a network that once prided itself on a diverse range of quality regional programming, local personalities and endearing regional identity. All that's left now is a washed out husk of what used to be - regional stagnation and a sanitised 'one size fits all' national identity.

Today's announcement that Ant & Dec's Saturday Night Takeaway has also gone down the road of ripping off viewers is a damning indictment of ITV plc's relentless pursuit of profit at the expense of programme quality. To use such a wholesome, family friendly entertainment show as a cover for large scale fraud is about as low as you can get Mr Grade.

This latest scandal revolves around the show's Jiggy Bank competition. Every week a large plastic pig, packed with £5000 worth of pound coins, was dispatched to a random location of the UK as nominated by competition callers. One caller would be selected at random to 'jiggy the pig' - namely to ride on top of the plastic beast and win the amount of cash they managed to shake loose for its innards. It transpires that the location of the pig wasn't that random after all, with a shortlist of possible venues being drawn up weeks before the programme aired. Jiggy Bank competition entrants were also filtered out geographically, so anyone more than 1 hour away from where the pig was scheduled to be stood no chance whatsoever of winning. Of course they didn't know this when they made their £1 calls to enter the competition.

Come on ITV plc - get your act together. You are giving the entire network a very bad name at the moment.

Anyone for Grey Squirrel?

American pest the grey squirrel.

An interesting addition has appeared on the menu of the Wild Boar Hotel, near Windermere in the UK's Lake District National Park. The restaurant is serving up free Peking-duck style grey squirrel pancakes to hungry diners. The squirrels, locally sourced from the hotel's 72-acres of woodland, are being prepared by head chef Marc Sanders.

Hotel general manager Andy Lemm said: "Although we do still have red squirrels, the greys are everywhere. Our diners seemed to enjoy the squirrel pancakes and I thought they tasted rather nice, a bit like rabbit."

The grey squirrel, an import from the US in the late nineteenth century, is widely regarded as a pest because of its ferocious appetite for acorns, tree shoots, flowers, nuts, fruits, roots and cereals. They are ground feeders and, unlike the timid native red squirrel, are able to digest acorns. The diverse diet and general hardiness of the grey means they have displaced the red in all but the most isolated coniferous locations in the UK.

Cute little UK native the red squirrel.
Note the tufty ears and bushy tail.

Surprisingly environment groups don't seem to have too much of a problem with the use of grey squirrel meat as a food source. Carri Nicholson of the Northumberland Wildlife Trust said: "It is far more ecologically and environmentally sound to find a use for what is being trapped.

"A number of places in Northumberland are thinking of having grey squirrel on the menu. I haven't tried grey squirrel but people I know who have say it tastes like chicken used to taste when it tasted like chicken."

In Northumberland, one of the last remaining red squirrel habitats, Liberal Democrat peer Lord Redesdale is heading up the Red Squirrel Protection Partnership (RSPP). The RSPP is a body committed to preventing the extinction of the red squirrel in Northumberland and actively traps and dispatches any greys found on their patch.

Squirrel Casserole:
Adapted from Terri Bloss' recipe.
Please note that this recipe is for grey squirrels only - no reds please!

Ingredients:

• 3-4 Squirrels, cooked and deboned
• 20 oz (560 grams) frozen broccoli pieces
• 1 cup chopped onion
• 1 cup chopped celery
• 1/2 cup chopped carrots
• 4 oz (113 grams) margarine
• 8 oz (225 grams) cheese whiz (any cheesy spread will do)
  
• 1 can cream of mushroom soup
• 1 cup cooked rice
  

Method:

• Parboil squirrels until tender and pick meat off the bones
• Cook broccoli and drain
• Sauté onions, celery and carrots in margarine until tender
• Blend cheese and soup into the onion mix
• Mix with squirrel, rice and broccoli
• Turn into a large casserole and bake for 1 hour at 180 C (350 F)
  
• Serve with Italian bread and apple sauce or a large tossed salad
  

Bon appétit!

Menzies Campbell Resigns

Sir Menzies Campbell plays paper, scissors or stone.

Veteran Liberal Democrat Sir Menzies (Ming) Campbell announced his resignation as the party's leader in a brief statement last night. Campbell, who has only been leader since May 2006, cited "questions about leadership" as the reason for the shock announcement. His deputy, Dr Vince Cable, will stand in as acting leader pending a leadership election in the new year.

Sir Ming's resignation letter to party president Simon Hughes MP read as follows:

The President
The Liberal Democrats
15th October 2007

When I was elected Leader of the Party in March 2006 I had three objectives. First, to restore stability and purpose in the party following my predecessor’s resignation and the leadership campaign itself, second to make the internal operations of the party more professional, and third to prepare the party for a General Election.

With the help of others, I believe that I have fulfilled these objectives, although I am convinced that the internal structures of the party need radical revision if we are to compete effectively against Labour and the Conservatives.

But it has become clear that following the Prime Minister’s decision not to hold an election, questions about leadership are getting in the way of further progress by the party.

Accordingly I now submit my resignation as Leader with immediate effect.

I do not intend to hold a press conference or to make any further comment.

Yours sincerely,

Menzies Campbell
Leader, Liberal Democrats

It has not been an easy few weeks for Sir Ming as the party's approval rating slumped to only 11%, the worst for more than a decade, in recent opinion polls. It's also believed the Prime Minister's decision to delay a general election until 2009 - 2010 has weighed heavily on Sir Ming's mind - he isn't getting any younger. It seems a shame that he's gone - I like the Liberal Democrats being reminded of their place as one of the nation's most inferior political parties!

Come On England

No frogs were hurt in the making of this ad.

I saw this humorous advert celebrating the English defeat of France last night in the Rugby World Cup semi final. Who would have thought England would get all the way to the final? Les blancs managed to squeeze home to victory with a five point lead, narrowly beating the tournament hosts by 14 points to 9. The success, as notable as it may be, has been slightly overplayed by The Sunday Times front page headline of: "England storm to World Cup final."

The final between England and either Argentina or South Africa will take place at the Stade de France stadium in Saint-Denis on Saturday, 20th October. Kick off is at 2100 hrs local time. Better get that fridge stocked with lager now!

From Acorns Come Big Trees

From acorns come big trees.

It's been a busy old week in UK politics.

Last week, at the Conservative Party conference in Blackpool, leader David Cameron gave a tremendous off-the-cuff speech to the party faithful (full text). Without the aid of an autocue and with minimal notes Cameron gave an unfaltering, impassioned performance outlining his vision - our vision - for the future of Britain. A Britain where hard work and the family are valued and where there's no place for petty bureaucracy and government interference.

In his closing speech to conference Mr Cameron pledged to scrap top-down targets in the NHS, cut stamp duty on homes, give more power to headteachers and make the police more accountable to the communities they serve. He also announced that a Conservative government would establish a lifeboat fund to give financial security and piece of mind to victims of Labour's pensions crisis - the crisis Gordon Brown presided over as Chancellor, but is now desperately trying to shy away from in premiership. Mr Cameron also voiced his support of the family unit, proclaiming it the best welfare system of all. The Conservatives will be "the party of the family" and will recognise the importance of the family in the tax system.

It was a great speech - so much so I got out my cheque book and ran to the post box to renew my membership. Judging by the about turn in the opinion polls I obviously wasn't the only person wooed by Cameron's speech. In the days after the Conservatives, previously 8 percentage points behind, levelled with Labour in the polls. A repeat performance during a general election would just about leave Labour in minority government in a hung parliament.

Also that week George Osborne, the Shadow Chancellor, outlined the next Conservative government's plans to raise the Inheritance Tax threshold to £1 million. Only millionaires would pay death duties and ordinary families will not be punished for working hard and saving hard. Liam Fox, Shadow Defence Secretary and former Army medical officer, spoke of a government that would honour our Armed Forces by looking after our service personnel and their families. William Hague, Shadow Foreign Secretary, reminded us of Labour's broken promise to hold a referendum on the EU constitution.

And what's the best the government can do in response to all of these ideas? Copy and paste them almost word for word in the recent Pre-Budget Report. Opportunism in its lowest form. To add insult to injury, after weeks of voter-friendly spin and strategically leaked policy, the Prime Minister bottled out of his much anticipated general election announcement because he was scared the nation would favour with the opposition. This is despite his bizarre and contradictory assurances that his government would actually win.

So Mr Brown, I challenge you again: "Call that election. We will fight - Britain will win."

Trouble at' Mill

I am pleased to announce that two of my favourite plasticine heroes are making a comeback to the small screen. Aardman Animations characters Wallace and Gromit are set to return for their fifth televisual outing in a short movie titled 'Trouble at' Mill'. The pair have also proved a hit on the big screen with their 2006 movie 'The Curse of the Were-Rabbit' winning the Oscar for best animated feature.

In the new movie, a murder mystery, Wallace and his vocally challenged companion Gromit run a bakery business in their home, which is converted into a granary complete with ovens, robotic kneading arms and other cracking contraptions. There's also a love interest for Wallace in the shape of bread enthusiast Piella Bakewell.

Speaking to BBC News creator Nick Park said: "The story takes Wallace and Gromit in a direction we haven't seen before - both emotionally and technically."

This latest installment of Wallace and Gromit comes 3 years after fire destroyed Aardman Animations' Bristol warehouse resulting in the loss of their historical archive. Objects from the Wallace and Gromit, Morph, Chicken Run and Creature Comforts movies were lost in the blaze.

Expect to see Trouble at' Mill on BBC One late next year.